The Lair of the Monkey

Well my finger is healing but the downward pressure on the keys irritates it - on the other hand I can wear a little cushioned bandage but it hits the other keys.  One thing I will tell you as a lesson to all this is that if you value your gaming (or anything else you do with your hands really) then a big recommendation is to really be careful around knives of any size.  Stay safe, kids!

Weefz (from The Average Gamer) and I have been having a really interesting discussion on games.  In my opinion, as games are a new medium of entertainment with only recent capabilities to provide graphics to support a story (rather than the sole focus being the gameplay) that storyline is still being overlooked.  I have never picked up a game for the reason of a storyline, though genre is of course incredibly important.  I’m also not sure I have ever picked up a game (barring Call of Cthulu: Dark Corners of the Earth) and though this has decent plotting and pacing - but then is that what games are about?  Anyway, go take a look at what we both have to say and feel free to add your comments there or here.

Unfortunately, my finger is still kind of slashed which means that I haven’t been doing that much gaming.  I’m typing with the bugger all bandaged up, and it hurts rather but the extra padding is making it at least usable.  Being injured, I’ve tried to give time to heal, which ironically has opened me up to rather more comedy injuries of the gameplaying type.  Obviously gamepads are not in the least made for someone who is any way out of the ordinary (barring the Wii remote) and you can tell that in the fact that I got cramp from using the 360 pad whilst keeping my finger out of the way of pressing any buttons.  This happened quite quickly and it was difficult to adapt…

… but adapt I did and I got the Ferrari Enzo in Test Drive Unlimited.  I also completed rather a lot of the game, a big shout out goes to CJ who is king of the car delivery challenges.  He’d probably be king of more of it too, as he has this weird ‘zone’ he gets into and can work out how to get the best turn-ins to keep optimum speed etc, but that’s another story.  Anyway, I’ll be adding a few articles once I’m not in a bandage, one will be a guide to Test Drive Unlimited (for those of you who haven’t worked out the easiest route through the game) and the other will be an investigation into the gaming ‘zone’ - where skills and obsession meet!

A game that I haven’t played too much of yet but am finding really good is Call of Cthulu: Dark Corners of the Earth.  I got that on the PC and it runs on max res, with all shaders etc on.  It actually looks quite pretty for an older game, but more to the point as I’m a huge fan of Lovecraft (it’s based on his mythos) and in particular The Shadow Over Innsmouth, I can tell a lot of the plot twists before they actually happen.   The characterisation is good and I’m keen to see how they have adapted the final part of the book.  I must say though the sanity effects are a little odd - as in “oh god there’s something mind shattering.  Lets just turn around and I won’t go mad”…

I’ve started going through Dead Rising again, though I don’t know if I’ll ever get through it completely again.  To be honest, it seems a bit of a slog last time, and there’s some rather good games coming out soon, but I’ll keep you informed as ever.  Anyway, all this typing has made my finger start to throb (make of that what you will…) so I shall catch you up later in the week for more informed games discussion.

Unfortunately this is not a super interesting article about games, but a notification that LOTM is going on pause for a few days.  The reason for this is that I applied a typical male-flawed solution - namely I cut open a tiny object with a massive serrated blade.  In doing so I lost a bit of my right index finger.  I’ve got no idea at this point how long it will take to heal but I will say that it is completely buggered and thoroughly bandaged at the moment.  Naturally this means typing, my favourite method of communicating to you all, really rather difficult at present and just a little frustrating.  I’ll try to give you all, my dear readers, an interesting link on say Saturday (27/01/07) but other than that a ‘real’ article may be about five days away.  Just when things were getting back to normal, it never rains but it pours, accidents will happen and many other curious non-sequiturs spring to mind…

Next up is Wii Sports, and let me say the best things in life are definitely free.  I can guarantee this will be the party game you will be using for a very long time and of course the price does help .  The boozing is brilliant it takes a lot out of you and it makes you immerse into the game as you move and punch like a boxer really would to activate the different moves for your Mii.  The one thing that does annoy me a bit is there’s no instructions on how to play the games like Baseball which I know NOTHING AT ALL about, it’s still really fun just hitting the ball as hard as you can though don’t get me wrong but when no one understands how to win and it’s always 0-0 at the end you feel a bit conned and move back to the other games, and following in the wake of Nintendo’s Brain Training (Dr Kawashimas - ed), Wii Sports also has a option to play every day and increase your fitness and so on.
The last game is Wii Play this game is so brilliant I would have bought the controller even if I had no one to play with . The fishing is hilarious in groups as your all trying to get the same bonus fish and everyone jumps the guy who just caught it, very memorable lol then there’s the shooting and shape fitting and so on and so on, it would take too much detail to try and explain it all so just go buy it and find out!! Right now!!! Why are you still reading this??!!

Well for you faithful still here or those who still have it you can agree with me that this game has THE best version of air hockey you will ever get.  I’m talking about twisting the angle of the paddle and of course the different speed of the strokes and so on all affect the trajectory.  Right I’m going to get this bit over with now very quickly so you don’t all wander off.  Cowkart, this is the god of games, I want it to be made into a full game RIGHT NOW Nintendo, it is absolutely brilliant and shows exactly how Mario Kart will play which many people have expressed concern over.  It’s so simple its amazing, all you do is turn the controller on the side, you tilt forward to move faster, tilt backward to break, jerk the controller up quickly to jump.  That’s it, yet it manages to make a game that is just so unique you’ll fall in love with it.

Finally, there’s the background facilities on the console.  The speaker in the controller always raises a smile and helps immerse you even more, and creating a Mii is pretty funny but comes to a new light when you save it to the controller and take it round your friends so they can take the mick out of it .  Personally I havn’t actually tried to internet functions of the console out yet but I have heard great things about it and I am dying to get in there.  So, that’s about it.  Go buy it.

A console is only as good as its games.  So what are the Wii games like?  Well from personal experience I can tell you that Zelda is absolutely fantastic.  I did feel a bit cheated by the final dungeons which seemed a bit short to me but take no notice of the likes of Gamespot it truly deserves a score (it sure got one from 1Up.com with everyone giving it a 10/10 - ed) in the high nineties because of the sheer thrill of the game. 

You just don’t want it to end and you really do feel more like the hero as your waving the controller around and riding about on horseback picking the Moblins off.  The whole Zelda magic is also there and as vibrant as ever, you feel connected to the characters and the music is amazing (it’s worth donating the cash to open the Hyrule towns Malo Mart for the music alone) yeah sure some complain “Oh in this day and age a game should have a full orchestra sound track”  Yeah right, as the saying goes its not what you’ve got its how you use it!

We can’t spend all day on Zelda though (okay I have but there’s a word limit here), so what’s next?  Well against a lot of criticism from friends and family I got Red Steel, and it is good.  It isn’t something to blow your mind away I admit but it is enough to keep you enjoying yourself which is what you bought it for in the first place so goody . 

As I said earlier it is also a great system for FPS’s and this is shown in Red Steel the lock on feature of the game spoils the atmosphere somewhat which is what is created so well with this new control system, so I suggest you just do what I do and don’t use it trust me you’ll enjoy it more.  The sword fighting sections are a bit of a let down to be honest, I really do think they could have made them better, but they are enjoyable and they do really help to immerse you into the character as you hold the duel remote as you would the real swords, amazing stuff.

What exactly is all the fuss about?  It can’t be that good can it?  Well the simple answer is yes it can be and yes it is.  Nintendo’s much awaited console has finally struck the world and brought with it a change to the world up there with TV and sliced bread.

With its beautiful control system and truly awe-inspiring skill of drawing you into its world the Wii has brought a massive influx of new gamers.  It is so easy to control you’ll soon ask how you could limit yourself to the gamepad, it just seems so natural.  Okay I admit it does feel a bit awkward at first but so does walking and talking, you just learn this a lot quicker and just like walking and talking you’ll be using the Wii constantly when your hooked, from giggling over the smooth disc loading action to your eyes watering over how the tiny console makes life so much easier when trying to figure out where to put it unlike the other bulkier consoles.

Okay we’ve all heard about all the new gamers but this is not what this website is for is it?  No, it is for you the hardcore fan, and you obviously want to know what this console offers you.  Well firstly I’m sure as an established gamer you realise just how exciting this control system is, it sounds trivial but you’ll know how exciting it is when I tell you about how in the new Metroid Prime you open the door as you would in real life, with the same twisting motion!  Even if that doesn’t make you excited (maybe I’m a bit sad ) what is enough is that your FPS’s and so on are a lot easier to control.

You thought the mouse was good for it?  Motion detection means it is quicker and a lot more accurate, something to truly split the men from the boys.  The whole quirkiness of the system also never fails to simply bring a smile to your face, something which hasn’t happened for a long time in the video game world, games such as Wii Sports and Wii Play display this perfectly, from the really intense Wii boxing to the frantic shoot out of the first challenge in Wii Play everything is there, oh and the Cowkart game has a special place in my heart move over Mario.

I’ve played games for a long time now.  I like to think that I’m sufficiently jaded that I won’t be surprised by a game, nor by the same token totally overwhelmed.  Frankly that last is completely true.  I don’t think I’m going off games (and so the blog is going to continue) but it does concern me.  If you are really wondering what’s brought this on though, it’s looking at my game collection.

• I have a 360.  Where’s the amazing big hitter I’m waiting for?  Was it Lost Planet?  Nope.  That was good but not it.  Was it TDU?  Well that’s fun but ultimately, like a wonderfully pretty but dim girl, rather unfulfilling after a while.  Was it Gears?  Hell no.  Don’t get me wrong, we spend hours at the weekend killing Locust, but beyond that it doesn’t get switched on.
• I love my horror games, and I don’t feel like I’m being catered to or for at the moment.  Dead Rising, with the comedy and the zombie-bashing just doesn’t really hit the sweet spot for me.
• As much as I mock my stupid looking GameCube (for those of you who don’t know what one is here’s a link to a GC) there were some truly thrilling game sessions on that, with Ikaruga, Super Monkey Ball and Soul Calibur 2 (one of my all time favourites, you cannot beat me!) showing some amazingly high playtime records.  Okay, so I’ve notched up almost 40 hours on Test Drive but none of my other games come anywhere close.
• I feel that in some games I’m naturally at a disadvantage with not having an HD TV.  I just know I’d see those turns/badguys better.  Whatever.
• The PS2 has a huge back catalogue of games - I bet that even if you live (or indeed still live) in a cave you’ll have played on one, if not owned one.  One of the most successful consoles ever, the PS2 had one especially amazing thing going for it.  Catalogue.  Whatever your genre, you’d have a choice of about a thousand different games.  No other console feels like it has this, and that disappoints me.  Variety is, after all, the spice of life, the beef of the bull and all that.
• One genre of games that seems to have almost fell dead is the beat-em-up.  I spent ages on Tekken (all iterations), Dead or Alive Ultimate and Virtua Fighter 3.  Ummm, hello… we have Dead or Alive 4 (a carbon copy of Ultimate with a bit more flash and a bit less skill) and what else?  Oh, confirmation of Virtua Fighter 4 for the 360.
• Can consoles only play like 3 types of game these days, shooter, driver and sandbox?  I mean what the hell, come on guys think of something new (and ideally horror based).

Anyway, I’m off to go and pick up a 360 control pad disconsolately and gaze at the lovely menu screen.  I mean when that’s what I’ve got to look forward to then damn are we in trouble.  On the other hand, I did see Resident Evil 5 and Forza 2 are out in March.  Hmmm maybe I should wait till then before throwing bricks at developers and publishers alike?  Oh alright, one more go of Test Drive.  Only if I can buy the Enzo though…

Dead Rising has been out for a while now, especially over in the US.  One of the things that made the game so famous (apart from all those damn zombies) is the save system.  Let’s take a look at how it works:  All you need to do is find either a bathroom or go back to the original security room.  So, is this a good or bad decision?

Positives:

• The tension can be so great when you’re runing around with low health.
• This can spur you on to play better to get to the next save.
• You can see save points on your map, so they aren’t that hard to find.
• Save points are in every area of the mall.

Negatives:

• Not being able to save any time you like can be incredibly frustrating.  What do you do if you need to quickly leave?  Well lose all your data of course!
• The game gets progressively more difficult and health items (food) are moved.  Why can’t there be more save points?
• Not being able to save seems like quite a retro decision, and is a bit bizzare when matched with how the game will save your level.
• The game can suffer at certain points from being a tad too difficult.  This can be matched if you haven’t saved on one of the truth case files.

Well there we are, good and bad points behind the save decision of Dead Rising.  Overall, I’ve found it more frustrating than good unfortunately, especially with regard to some of the truth case files which seem to be far more difficult than anything else in the game.  Nevertheless, I’m going to go on and try to get the good ending as I think the storyline has been pretty good.

Test Drive Unlimited, TDU, TDU, Test Drive Unlimited.  I’m hopelessly and utterly addicted to this game now, in so much that nothing else gets played on the 360, barring when someone else is over and we might play a bit of Gears of War.  Might.  I love the car models, the races and the speed camera events.  I also love the funky car I now have.

I bought the Pagani Zonda C125S (or is it the F?).  Anyway, I’ve had it suped-up to the max so it now runs at a 238 top speed, which is insane.  There’s still other vehicles out there that are a tad faster and a bit better on the old acceleration and brakes, but overall this is now my killer car.

Currently I’m just tootling around the world trying to find every event of every type before I go on some record setting game beating.  It’s happening slowly and as you can see I don’t have that many unlocks yet (Gamertag: blackvv) but I’m working on it.  This is certainly one of the better racing games on the 360.

If you want a few hints and tips on the game, then look out for the analysis/top ten I’ll be doing for Test Drive Unlimited on the 360 tomorrow.  Should be a good un, with advice on driving, house buying and of course the all important cars.  Well anyways, must be off, I need to go and do some study before gaming later on…